I am overwhelmed!

I usually don't blog when I am feeling this way (thus my long periods of silence). I don't know why everything seems to be taking its toll on me, but it does. I am worried about Bert, I don't know how to go about making new friends, I don't make enough money to live in Austin, I don't know where my job is going....I feel like I am buried under the weight of all of this and don't know how to get out from underneath it all. All I can do is eat chocolate chip cookies! Yeah, like that is helping anything! If I didn't have this chaos, I know I would just create some. In some sick way, I like chaos. When things are running smoothly, I can't stand it. I have to stir things up. Is that not pathetic??!! Well, I have a lot of things stirred up right now and am going bonkers! I am trying to take one second at a time...even that seems hard right now. Forget about one minute, hour, or day....