I can smell the weirdness from here...

So Stacy I and attempted to go to the Red Bull Flugtag on Saturday. It was held in Austin. Handmade flying machines launched off of a pier over the river. What's not to love about that?? Apparently lots of things...the crowd, the beer running out by 7, etc. Stacy and I watched the jumbotron for a while. You can see one of the machines going off of the pier in the first picture. Anyway, we gave up and headed to the Horseshoe Lounge. Great dive bar...lots of blue hairs, among others - like the 22 year old pool shark with his two cues that he brought in. The jukebox is awesome. Lots of classic country and funky music. Stacy even bought tamales while we were there. Nothing like ice cold beer and hot tamales. They also have a poker table inside. This might become our new hang out to throw bones (play dominoes). What a night we had. Too much fun and too many beers. Stacy is seriously a bad influence!!

Have to give a shout out...

Hi de ho, neighborinos! I haven't totally publicized that I have a blog. One of my friends/neighbors from Houston, Kate, did some googling and found my blog. Hope she wasn't totally bored looking at my posts! She is married to DugDug, aka Douglas. BTW, Douglas says he didn't MEAN to pee on that dog! I blogged a blurb about him peeing on a dog. He just wanted to set the record straight!! LOL

I have been tagged...

by my sister's blog. That is what I get for reading it!! She is at fatandscrappy.blogspot.com. I am supposed to answer the following questions...
1. What three famous people (dead or living) would you like to have dinner with:
a) Captain Jack Sparrow - as much as I love Johnnie Depp, it would have to be Cap'n Jack. To me, he is the perfect man...a little dangerous, a little silly, a lot charming, a little goofy, funny, resourceful, lucky, a lot sexy, plus really easy to look at. If it can't be a fictional character, then Johnnie Depp would do! And seriously, I would hope my dinner would have a "happy ending"!
b) Will Ferrell - he just cracks me up! He might not be funny in real life, but I would still love to talk to him and find out what he thinks is funny and what makes him tick.
c) I feel I have to select someone serious! I would really like to meet a woman who fought for change. I think that we as Americans have gotten too fat and happy... we don't have the gumption to effect change. I think America is on a down hill slide. I would like to do something to change that, but don't know how or where to start. I think it would be very insightful to talk to a women that did suffer and did something about it, or saw a wrong and fought to make it right. There are so many famous and non famous women that would fall into this category. Can't choose one!

2. What celebrity would play you in a made for TV movie? This is a hard one. Can I say Angelina Jolie with a straight face?? LOL! Someone funny, quirky, that changes their hair a lot, compassionate, and dead sexy! LOL. Is there a celebrity that is like that now?? Maybe Mike Myers in drag.

3. Is there anything you would go back and change in your life? I would say a lot of things, but then I wouldn't be the person I am today. My trials and tribulations have made me how I am today. I kind of like myself, so I don't know that I would change a thing. Might make me totally different.

4. If you had more than enough money and could donate large sums to any worthy cause, what would that cause be? I hate to steal my sister's answer, but I would support those that can't support themselves - animals and children.

5. What is your dream career? I don't know that I know the answer to this one. Something I am good at, to keep me stimulated, and that makes a difference. Making a little bit of money would be nice too. I don't have to make a lot, just enough to keep a roof over my head and a vacation every once in a while!

Coconut bra album with pictures from Hawaii

This is the bra...inside front cover and back cover. Fun to make. I still think I am going to do something to the outside. I have two more to make!

My weekend was Superbad!

The first picture is me and Slutina (aka Sylvia). Love this woman...she is an awesome friend and always there for me when I need her. I hope I do the same. The second is a picture of a layout I did this weekend. Syl came in on Friday. My sister came in on Saturday. We went to an all day crop (12 pm to 12 am) on Saturday. I worked on that layout and a coconut bra album with Hawaii pictures. I will post the album in a separate blog. We had the women at the crop laughing and amazed. Laughing just because we are funny and amazed just because of our skills! I have, like, ninja scrapbooking skills! LOL! I really don't, but sometimes I can throw some stuff together that looks good. Sunday we went to see Superbad. OMG...that movie was hilarious. That was when the beer ban was officially lifted. Stacy went to the movies with us and ordered a pitcher of beer. Love Alamo Draft House! Movies are $6 before 6 and you can get real food and beer!!! HELLO! Forget Cinemark and the rest!!

This shit bugs me!

I have seen several signs lately that get on my nerves. The spacing is wrong. I am not a "wyle e. coyote super genius", by any means. But, I know a few things. One sign, I pass everyday at a BBQ place. This is how it reads: Grab a Family (next line) Pak on your way (next line) Home. I know what it is supposed to say, but it doesn't flow. That shit bugs me. You know what else bugs me, my crappy internet. I typed a whole, long blog today. I lost my internet connection, so I lost my blog. I have to type the whole F$%king thing over. Sucks. I will get to it, but probably not right now. It has been another one of those Mondays. The beer ban has been lifted! Hallelujah!

I am a Gecko Killer!!! {and other stuff}

I feel so bad...there has been a gecko running around my apartment for a few days. I have found him in the kitchen and in the bathroom - around my clothes hamper. I have been meaning to try and catch him. Today I decided to do some laundry. Guess what fell out of the dryer, as soon as I opened the door (after my clothes were dry)? Yep...burnt gecko! That is the only way I found him, he fell right out. I thought maybe I left something in my clothes, so I picked it up to examine it. Poor thing.
I have been trying to clean today. I have seriously cut back on my paper purchases and I still have the stuff all over! My friend Sylvia, from Houston, is coming to visit this weekend and my sister will be here too. We are going to a crop on Saturday. I am trying to clean and get my supplies together. Of course I can't find half of the stuff that I need, for the projects I want to work on. Why is that always the case??
I have a new favorite catch phrase. My sister sent me the link to Kevin Smith's blog the other day. I love Kevin Smith...writer, director, actor. He is funny. Anyway, on his blog he was talking about the day he was having. He had a bad thing happen and then the rest of the day was good. Instead of saying it was good, he said it was "all blowjobs and lollipops!". HA! That cracks me up! Don't ask me how I am doing, if you don't want to hear that! That is so what I am going to tell you...."it's all blowjobs and lollipops, Baby!"!

Leslie

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leslie_Cochran

I have blogged about Leslie once before. He is the most famous homeless person in Austin. I mean, come on, he has is own set of refrigerator magnets!! Anyway, I was hanging out at Stacy's house tonight. She is getting new roommates. Stacy's cousin Corey and Corey's boyfriend Kenny are moving in. Corey's brother (Adam) lives close to Leslie. I think Leslie lives in a storage shed or small room on someone's property in south Austin. Leslie hangs out at Adam's house a lot. Adam was helping Kenny move stuff today. Somehow Leslie got involved. It might be because he has moved so many times, or he might just be handy with spatial relations, but Leslie was dictating the move. He was telling them how to load vehicles, what to move first, etc. Here he is over at Stacy's house....his purse slung over one shoulder, his fake boob bra on, in a short yellow skirt telling the men how to move and what to move. Oh man, you just got to love Austin!

Saturday, I went to a wedding held on the sun.

It really wasn't held on the sun (duh!), but it was hot. I mean HOT! OMG! Every

one melted. The festivities started on Wednesday. Some of us got together to make "floozy koozies". Kimberly (the bride, on the left of both pictures) wanted these to be the thank you gift, as well as helping keep every one's beverages cooler. We decorated 75. Kimberly's mom had already decorated 75 by herself before we even started on Wednesday. If you don't know what a floozy koozie is, it is just a koozie with all kinds of fabric, feathers, beads, etc. on it. We had some "masculine" looking ones for the men! HA! Stacy's was dark green camo that had a ring of red dangling beads around the lip. Her koozie made the statement "I like to hunt, but I am also a lady". Mind had flame fabric on it with a ring of black feathers around the lip. I was told mine made the following statement "I am a slut". Yeah, right! If you know anything about me, you know that isn't true! That is why it was so damn funny! On Friday was the pre-wedding party. That was fun, held at the bride and grooms house. Debbie Jack is one of the bride's best friends (she is the third from the left in the floozy koozie picture). I ended up driving her home...she was so dang drunk! Love me some Debbie Jack, she is hilarious. The actual wedding was on Saturday. The first picture above is my favorite of the ones I took. I think I took over 100. I was trying to capture a picture of Kimberly and Tony had to stick his big ol' melon in the frame! The look on his face cracks me up! After the reception, we had a post wedding/reception party. I was so exhausted from the heat, I think I lasted about 1 hour at the party! I am getting too old for this....

I get myself into so damn much trouble!

So, I was going to go out to dinner with Stacy last night. We were just going to go out for some Mexican food. Stephanie decides that she wants to go, but wants to go somewhere she can take her dog. So, we settle on Freddie's. I was just going to eat and not drink any alcohol. We get there and Stephanie orders a bucket of beer, for herself, and Beaver is our waiter (I have already blogged about Beaver...I love me some Beaver! He could so be my main gay.). I knew right then I was in trouble. I eat and have a diet coke. One margarita leads to 4 margaritas, which leads to about 7 buckets of beer. We befriended two lesbians....well, they really aren't lesbians, because they are both in relationships with men but they also see each other. One of the girls used to be a stripper and she has fake boobs. Stephanie and I have never felt fake boobs before and this girl actually lets us feel her boobs! In the middle of Freddie's outdoor patio! And they feel totally different...they were kind of hard. They looked good, but they felt weird. Anyway, so the evening progresses, and someone realizes that Stephanie's dog is gone. We have no idea where he went. She totally lost her dog! Now, this is the girl that doesn't like pets to begin with...we told her not to get a dog and this just proved it!!! Everyone is looking for the dog...here he comes from the street! This is a busy street that Freddie's is on, lots of bars and restaurants, plus a ton of homes. She is so lucky he didn't get hit. At this point, everyone who is left in the place ends up at our table. Apparently they close early on Monday night. Beaver has called last call about 3 times...we end up with a couple of buckets of beer each time. I don't know how many times we cashed out before we actually left (this reminds me of another time I was with these two on the River Walk in San Antonio. We cashed out our tab 3 times at Dick's Last Resort and each time it was over $100. That was all drinks, no food!). Stacy is the smart one and she goes home when they finally kick us out. Stephanie ends up leaving with the two lesbians to go get something to eat. I end up going to another bar with 3 guys. Don't ask me their names, all I know is one guy had a great dane named Jake. We go to Opal Divines because they also allow dogs. There are 3 of us drinking...we end up with 3 pitchers of Hefeweizen. Hefeweizen is not a beer you need to be drinking when you are already drunk. Not only did I shut down Freddie's, I shut down Opals. I don't know what the hell I was thinking. After Opals I head home. Don't ask me about the incident in the gas station parking lot. The story is funny as hell...but I am so not telling it here. I was by myself and I pretty much made a fool out of myself! Like, I embarrassed myself in front of myself! LOL! So, Stephanie calls me at the crack of dawn this morning. We have both decided to stop drinking for a while. I tell her what I did in the gas station parking lot and she tells me what she did. Yeah, not drinking for a while is probably for the best! She ended up not going to get something to eat with the lesbians, she went through the drive thru at Taco Cabana and ended up with beans all over the front seat of her car. She gets home and decides to feed her dog...when she wakes up with morning there is a trail of dog food all over her house. Not from the dog, from drunk ass Stephanie. Not only that, there is a nice grease spot on her sliding glass door. When she sees this, she remembers running into the door. She thought it was open and totally hit it face first. OMG...I am laughing so hard right now I can't even type. Seriously, I was only going out for dinner! Stephanie is right, this is like high school only we have more money and no curfew! All that is going to do is get us into bigger trouble!!!

Hawaii = Beauty

Picture freakin' perfect. O'ahu was so damn gorgeous! I can't even believe I got to visit...probably the most beautiful place I have ever been. I can't wait to do something with all the pictures. I have several projects in mind. We had such a great time, even before we left. Pre hawaii we got together at Holly's house to watch shows on Hawaii. Not Magnum PI or Hawaii 5-0. Travel shows. Holly is the master of planning a trip. She came up with some great stuff. Stephanie and I just let her have at it. We were scattered all over the plane, but managed to have fun on the plane. We collected at the emergency exit doors every hour or so. You aren't supposed to stand in the way, but we live life on the edge like that! BTW, the picture with the surfboard, left to right is Stephanie, Holly, Nikki. This was the park we painted in. The picture of me and Stephanie is Turtle Bay on the north shore. Anyway, as soon as we landed, we hit the ground running. One of the best stories is Stephanie in her dirty pee pants. Oh man, I about pee in my own damn pants every time I think of it. Stephanie had a little accident on Saturday morning while we were out and about and she was still in her "dirty pee pants" (from Ballad of Ricky Bobby) at the end of that night. She had ample opportunity to change...she never did! I love that girl. We laughed so much, the whole trip. Holly is such a proper and nice person. Then there is me and Stephanie. Steff doesn't have any filters. She says whatever pops into her head. Her head is all over the place! Then there is me...with my potty mouth! What a trio. Stephanie would says something and Holly's response would be something sweet, but would put Stephanie in her place. My response would be "f&ck off Stephanie". I can't wait to take another trip with them. I was worried about getting along with Holly. I have known Stephanie since High School, over 20 years. Stephanie and Holly met in college. I wasn't sure how the whole dynamic would work. Holly and I got along great....Stephanie probably got picked on because we each know her best. Anyway, Stephanie had a motto for the whole trip..."we can't screw this up. No matter what we do, or don't do, we are in HAWAII". Amen, sister. I would go back in a heartbeat!

Here it is....

So many have asked to see it (okay, maybe one person has asked to see it). Here is my watercolor that I painted in Hawaii. Diamond Head is in the background. I will blog more about Hawaii later...it was awesome! I seriously contemplated staying - calling up my sister and telling her to keep, sell, or throw away everything in my apartment! As exciting as being homeless and sleeping on Waikiki beach sounds, I just thought I couldn't do it like that!